Let me tell you about my sleeping schedule- or lack there of... All my life I have approached sleeping as an activity option once I had run out of any other possible activities I could do; hanging out with friends, watching TV, or taking apart my furniture and putting it back together just because. I have never really required much sleep to function properly and so when I am faced with the option of sleeping or doing anything else, anything else usually wins out. There is just to much stuff I might miss out on if I go to sleep. (This is NOT a good way to secure a solid sleeping schedule.) More often than not I would end up totally backwards and have to forego a nights sleep, staying up for days on end until I was so tired sleep was the only thing on my mind. Then I would crash hard and reset my body clock. And for the most part, I honestly enjoyed this approach.
Tracy on the other hand is responsible and disciplined. She is one of those people that gets a solid 8 hours a night. I have always been fascinated with her ability to hit REM sleep as soon as she closes her eyes. And then once she gets into a comfortable position she stays there without moving all night... it amazes me!
We have now been married for almost 3 weeks and neither of us have really slept since then. We wake up every 10 to 15 minutes throughout the night and then fight to get back to sleep. We thought that maybe it was our new bed. Too firm? Could it be the fact that our AC broke while were on our honeymoon and our house was like Guantanamo Bay for the past week and a half? Just a stifling hot box... That too may have had something to do with it. Fortunately, that was finally fixed yesterday and I think it definitely helped. For some reason, whether consciously or subconsciously, we are unable to get used to the fact that there is someone else in our bed.
After talking to a few people about our situation it seems as though lot's of newlyweds go through the same thing. Does anyone have any good advice about how to break through to the sweet land of sleep? Let us know- We'll try anything : )
It may just take time. And if that's the case, we're in it for the long haul so I'll keep you posted down the road when we are not both zombies.
The chart below indicates that Tracy and I are somewhere in between a "Horse" and a "Goat" Booooooo...
| Species | Average Total Sleep Time (hours/day) |
|---|---|
| brown bat | 19.9 |
| python | 18.0 |
| owl monkey | 17.0 |
| human infant | 16.0 |
| tiger | 15.8 |
| squirrel | 14.9 |
| golden hamster | 14.3 |
| lion | 13.5 |
| gerbil | 13.1 |
| rat | 12.6 |
| cat | 12.1 |
| mouse | 12.1 |
| rabbit | 11.4 |
| jaguar | 10.8 |
| duck | 10.8 |
| dog | 10.6 |
| bottle-nosed dolphin | 10.4 |
| baboon | 10.3 |
| chimpanzee | 9.7 |
| guinea pig | 9.4 |
| human adolescent | 9.0 |
| human adult | 8.0 |
| pig | 7.8 |
| gray seal | 6.2 |
| goat | 5.3 |
| cow | 3.9 |
| sheep | 3.8 |
| elephant | 3.5 |
| donkey | 3.1 |
| horse | 2.9 |
| giraffe | 1.9 |
| Sources: References 1, 5, 16, and 36. | |
*Upon re-reading this I realize now that it may seem like I am unhappy to be sharing a bed with Tracy. That could not be farther from the truth. And truth be told, I would gladly forego sleep for the rest of my life if that meant I got to sleep in the same bed as her so if your advice was to sleep in different beds you are fired and forbidden to comment on this post...
11 comments:
I love the chart! I would say my pregnancy has me operating in the babboon/chimpanzee range and Ryan is more in the Gray Seal/Goat category.
Either way, it took Ryan and I a good amount of time to adjust to having someone else in our bed. It's been 5 years now, and most nights I still get the "hunny, can you move over any farther?" question...to which I respond by falling off my side of the bed.
Ha!! Thats great! I know what you going through John and I had some trouble for sure... he I think got use to it much faster then I, but never the less it was weird!
Lets just say we both had alot of waking up through out the night for the first little bit of our marrage! I'm trying to remember if there was somthing that helped or if it as just a time thing.
I know that the time thing works for sure but also I know that when John is being too loud weather its snoring or chomping (yes you read right CHOMPING) then I wake him up and tell him to turn on his side! then he is as quiet as a baby! but he can fell righ back to sleep once I do that, so it depends on the person. John says that I hummmm in my sleep! Ha! I beleive him too because some times I wake my self up!
After five years I dont really notice John to much at night... we also have a King size bed so that helps too!
Hope that helps LOVE the blogging! Keep up the stories! LOVE YOU GUYS!
Sorry my comment was alomost as long as your blog!! Ha!
Angela
Like you, I would gladly face any consequence if it meant I got to sleep in the same bed as my wife. If we're in the same city, we're in the same bed. We don't sleep in separate beds - even when the flu hits, or snoring happens (me, not her), or fatigue increases. As I recall, I didn't sleep through a full night for six months after we were married! I'd doze for a few minutes and then think "Yiiiiii! Someone is in my bed!" Such thoughts would wake me up...and I'd remember, "Oh yea, I'm married."
My advice...sleep in the same bed. After 2.5 decades of sleeping alone it takes a bit of getting used to....but you can do it!
Oh. I'm so glad you guys have a blog. I love it. Andy and I had the same sleep issue...and really, time is the trick.
He still swears he hasn't slept as good as he did when he lived at home and slept on his twin loft bed! I think he slept so good because he had no worries other than to wake up, eat, use the restroom and hang with friends. Maybe you and Tracy should get a loft bed. haha.
great blog. i really enjoyed the "sleep table."
i think our only adjustment was going to bed at the same time. i had trouble with that forever because i used to stay up late, and nic goes to bed at ten. nic and i did, however, agree that sleeping is inevitable and easy when you have a kid... it doesn't matter who's around or how uncomfortable you are. if you're in bed, you're asleep :)
I think Nic is wrong.
First off Andy is wrong...I mean look at him and tell me he isn't wrong! (Andy how can I be wrong without even posting yet?)
Anyway I didn't have much of a problem falling a sleep with Jen. That being said having someone else in the bed was the least of our concerns since our honeymoon consisted of us, a boat and a cyclone. Also Jen hit me a few times in the middle of the night. She must have had a little more getting used to it than me. I've have always been a go to bed at 10 type of guy but lately it's been pushed back to 11. I'm also a very light sleeper. Just knowing that a light is on keeps me awake (Like a the my phone charging or Jen's computer) After Logan came I was able to sleep hard as soon as I hit the bed. Now having a baby isn't the answer mostly because the sleep you get is few and far between in the beginning. Now that Logan is sleeping better my hard sleeping ways are going away and lights bother me again.
Anyway the air conditioner is a must. That has to be the problem. If not Just pull out Shen Mu and go to work.
Hey Dyo
The way I see it is that this takes time to get over. I was the same way when Angie and I first got married. I like my space, and had got used to having the queen size bed all to myself. I stretch out quite a bit and slowly move into REM.
Angie is like Tracey and is out as soon as she hits the pillow.
It took us getting a bigger bed, and we now have a king, which gives me more room to get comfortable.
Whatever you do ... don't add pets to the scenario. Having two dogs added to our mix can at times throw me off all over again.
Final thought ... get all of your energy out before bed. Yes I am talking about what you think I am, but also insinuating that you need to try your best to stay active, doing stuff together outside the house. In short - burn your energy.
Dad sleeps like Tracy....head hits the pillow and he's out. My brain, like Aaron's, takes a while to shut off. Having a large, loud fan blowing and a motinless KING sized mattress has helped. Love you guys! Sweet Dreams :-)
It must be dark....totally dark.
Put a wash cloth over the LED on
the alarm clock....total darkness.
My husband is military on submarines so he's in and out constantly... Every fourth night when he's IN port he stays on the boat, and beyond that he's gone randomly for weeks, sometimes months, at a time.
All of that takes some SERIOUS readjusting every time, especially for someone like me who needs constants to help me sleep (my brain gets too excited at change to allow for sleep)
May I suggest getting into a routine outside of each other: I always sleep on the same side of the bed, go through the same presleep routine every night.
It helps train my subconscious to know when is sleep time.
I say HELPS because it doesn't always work. lol. It's been about a year and a half or more since I've gotten a good nights rest. Lol. Thanks US NAVY.
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